as i lay dying in kensington gardens

Today is my grandmother's 64th birthday. It is also the Olsen Twins' 21st birthday. Go birthdays.

Anyways, today I rode the trolley into town and shopped at the thrift/antique shops. Thought about buying an old copy of "Peter Pan in Kensington Gardens" but opted for William Faulkner's "As I Lay Dying" instead.

I decided something today: I live vicariously through the lives of other people and I hate it.

I'll just leave it at that.

Well, actually, no, I won't. I'll add this: I feel like I'm stuck in limbo. I feel like I'm a 14-year-old girl stuck in the body of a 21-year old who is expected to behave like a 45-year-old woman. I feel incredibly lost and alone. I don't feel old enough or experienced enough to be the actual age that I am, but I also feel like people expect me to be so old. They expect me to think older, look older, dress older...I hate it! I just want to be my age but it's like I can't even tell you what my age is.

What's my age again? ha.

Shoot, here I go all emo-depressing, stressing on this blog. Sorry.